Nobody Taught You This Part About Leadership

The leadership nobody prepares you for — and how to step into it anyway.

By Sheronda D. Grant  |  We Are Strong Enough

Nobody sat me down and told me that the hardest part of leadership isn't the job — it's the people who don't want you to do it well.

I had to figure that out on my own. And I did — but not without some real moments that tested everything I thought I knew about myself.

There are things they don’t put in leadership books. Things that don’t show up in training academies or promotional prep courses. Lessons you only learn when you’re actually in the seat — when the office politics get messy, when someone undermines your authority, when you’re expected to produce results with less resources and twice the scrutiny.

I want to talk about some of those things today.

Getting the title doesn't mean they'll accept your authority.

When I got promoted more than ten years ago, I thought the hard part was over. I studied. I prepared. I earned it. What I didn’t anticipate was walking into rooms where some people had already decided they weren’t going to follow my lead — regardless of the rank on my sleeve.

Here's what I learned: authority is assigned, but influence is earned. You can mandate compliance. You cannot mandate respect. And the leaders who rely solely on their title to get people moving are the ones who struggle the most when things get hard and when morale is low.

The leaders who actually move people — who build teams that show up, stay loyal, and push past the hard days — are the ones who invest in relationships before they ever need anything from them.

That is leadership at the reverent level. Reverent leadership is earned.

You will have to lead people who don't want to be led by you.

This one is uncomfortable to talk about, but it’s real. In law enforcement, the culture runs deep. And when a new leader steps in — especially one who doesn’t fit the traditional mold — there will be people who test you. Not because you’re a bad person or a bad leader. But because change is threatening, leadership transitions are unsettling, and generally speaking, you are new to their environment, their subculture, their way of doing things.

What I’ve found, after over a decade of leadership, is that most resistant employees aren’t resistant to you — they’re resistant to what they think you represent. Change they don’t want to adhere to. Their past supervisor who let them down. The policy they felt was unjust. The promotion they didn’t get that you received instead. Also keep in mind, your presence in a leadership role may challenge their cultural or gender beliefs. The list goes on.

Your job isn’t to take it personally.  Your job is to stay consistent. Of course, you want them to see that you’re different from whatever story they’ve already written about you, but that is not your goal.  You must stay committed to your values because if their opinion never changes about you, it’s okay. You can’t focus on changing everyone’s mind about you. You have to stay focused on the mission, while leading in an empathic manner and by holding your people accountable to task when necessary.

That takes patience and it is a balancing act. It takes showing up the same way on the hard days as you do on the easy ones. It takes not flinching when someone pushes back. It takes knowing your department policy, standard operating procedures, and knowing what’s best for your team based on insight they may not have.

It's exhausting. But it's also how you build a strong reputation that lasts.

Taking care of your people IS the job.

One of the biggest misconceptions new leaders carry is that leadership is about managing tasks. Let me be clear — the tasks matter. Accountability, performance, results — all of it matters. But tasks don't complete themselves. People do. And if you're managing the work without managing the people doing the work, you're only doing half the job. You can't have one without the other.

When I started overseeing larger teams, I had to make a deliberate choice: am I going to be the supervisor who manages from a distance and tracks outputs, or am I going to be the leader who actually knows what's going on with my people?

I chose the latter. And it changed everything — not just for them, but for me. When officers know their supervisor sees them as a whole person — not just a badge number — they perform differently. They communicate differently. They bring problems to you before the problems become incidents.

This isn't soft leadership. This is smart leadership. And in law enforcement — where mental health, burnout, and morale are constant battles — it might be the most important thing you do.

Here's what I want you to take from this.

Leadership in law enforcement is one of the hardest jobs there is. Not because of the calls, not because of the hours — but because you're doing all of that while also being responsible for the development, safety, and morale of the people around you, along with ensuring that the needs of your community are met.

That's a weight. And not enough people acknowledge that.

But here's what I know to be true after 24 years: the leaders who grow are the ones who stay curious, stay humble, and stay committed to their people even when it's hard. Especially when it's hard.

Understand that there will be challenges you will have to overcome. Stay focused on the mission. Stay focused on your purpose, and most importantly don't quit. You were built for this. Now go lead like it.

What's the one thing about leadership you wish someone had told you earlier?

Drop it in the comments — I read every one.

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